Daft Searches

It never ceases to amaze me how people end up at my site, using Google Analytics, I can see exactly what people searched for on Google to find me, sometimes you have to wonder what people were actually looking for with these searches - here's just a few of the stranger ones...

• girls on tractors
  I told you it was a big turn on for some people. This is one of the top searches that ends people up on my blog.
• naked girls on tractors
  It just gets better.
• frankie says your gay shirt
  Ahem. Does he?
• avril lavigne shoes
  Obviously I'm not the only one that wants them. Why stop at the shoes though? They really aren't her best feature.
• bamboo yellow shoe
  Even the Dutch aren't that daft.
• blindfolded gang
  I don't ever remember writing that blog - I must have been very fucked up...
• classy hen do in leeds
  There's no such thing.
• hiccuping podcast
  Somebody was actually expecting to find a podcast about hiccuping??
• how to make ninja shoes
  Everyone's after a pair of these bad boys.
• kidman compass
  It's mine and no-one else can have it.
• middle age woman feels ugly
  Have a Hen party, everyone else is doing it.
• mixer+shoe
  There's better ways to DJ
• naked indian guy
  That was just a rumor, it never actually happened.
• party threesome leeds gem
  You can get anything on Google these days.
• shoes tiesto
  More Dutch shoe madness. Those crazy Dutch.
• shoes to go on your myspace page
  Err. It's a webpage, and therefore not strictly necessary to dress it. It will look crap all season all by itself.
• sperm on shoes
  Easily done.
• sugar paste shoes step by step
  ?
• ugly fat middle-aged people
  Surely you don't need to search on Google to see these? If that's your thing, just come to Leeds.
• ultra-power gay
  That's a super-hero I hope they never make a comic about. Perhaps you can buy gay electricity now. Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "turn on the light".
  
• washing up as lube sex
  That's just NASTY! Extra points if you can blow bubbles with it though.
• what biscuits do old people like
  Stale ones.
• website with nothing but yellow shoes
  There's a market to be cornered, clearly.

I kid you not, these were all things that people have searched for and ended up at my site - that list is only from the last month!